You ever been in a store, waiting in line to be cashed out and there are a few sistas in line with you, your phone goes off and Led Zeppelin's is on your ringtone? You get the scuffs, the look of confusion or maybe disgust? Why on earth would this black chick have rock music as a ringtone? This girl is lost! She thinks she's white. All this coming from another sista?
Sadly, I have experienced all thee above............
Maybe some of you haven't had the pleasure of dealing with this but for those that have, I'm sure you can relate. I hate to separate my sista's into compartments. But in reality there is a separation. There are various facets of us but I'm gonna talk about these two particular types of sista's.
You have the mainstream, the more socially accepted black girl. She likes "black girl" things...just listens to R&B and hip hop, likes shopping, usually is not socially awkward, tends to be a little more popular.(I'm not trying to be stereotypical or say a nerd can't like hip hop or a mainstream black girl can't be a Wolverine fan but rather paint a clear picture for you.)We are of the same race but can be culturally different.
Then you have the nerdy sista....jams to rock and new age music, likes attending comic con conventions. We have so many dimensions to us, but are all of "us" accepting of our differences and interests?
Some of us (nerds) never had any shame in our game when it came to our hobbies and "unusual" interests for a black person. Some of us were always.... a nerd. Yes, I admit from my own personal experience it did make slightly difficult to connect with my own people. My interest in Art, superheros and my taste in music.
Deep down there is such a longing to connect with one another but yet some sista's just aren't open to expanding their horizons and cultivating relationships with a sista slightly different from her. Even something as simple as conversing about music or plans for the weekend can be a down right challenge if one is not willing to learn each other. The key is to be open minded.
Don't worry about your image or what someone may think of you talking to one who is ......let's say.... unusual. Some of the best friendships are made when two are completely different. This goes for my nerdy sista's too!
Get it out of your mind that she seems too odd or strange for your liking.... give her a chance. C'mon! Conversations can be so dynamic coming from two different perspective's. You may never know what you may have in common too.
Here's another random thought:
It's cool to be a Nerd. A Black Nerd. Sporting a cartoon or batman shirt is the thing. Ten to fifteen years ago a black girl...or guy for that matter who'd rather rock it out to Queen rather than to Lil' Wayne (nothing against him), would have their "Black Card" revoked. Some would feel the need to hide their interests in video games, comics or keep their obsession with cartoons on the down low. The style of being a nerd is more accepted than the actual lifestyle.
Back in the day the term nerd was reflected upon the negative. But now thanks to mainstream rappers like Kanye West rocking the jersey sweaters, wearing the big glasses the black nerd is definitely cool. Steve Urkel would have been The Man in this generation. Okay...Enough ranting.
I'm not saying to convert and change who you are but let's stop tearing each other down because we are different. You miss out on meeting great people by limiting who you choose to socialize with solely based on personality, interests or style. Don't make fun of her because she's different. Embrace her.
Granted we all naturally gravitate towards people we have things in common with. But in reality, we all have struggles and dreams. Our differences should not deter us from relating one another.
It's something to ponder.....................
God Bless!
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