Let's be real :Why are sista's so hard on eachother: My rant

Now we know in reality that women sometimes have a rather difficult time getting along whether it be in the work place or a social setting. As you can see from the picture there is a Caucasian woman and a African American women. "It doesn't make you less of a woman to give another woman a compliment." But in my opinion and in my personal experience black woman have the hardest time doing this.

Disclaimer: I know this isn't the case for ALL black women and can have cultivating relationships but in retrospect this odd black girl thinks its sadly very prevalent specifically among black women.

I am sure you all seen tons and tons of articles,  the videos and the and debates on how critical black women can be on each other. This may not pertain to ALL sistas but I feel as though its' a major and rather unnecessary issue in the black community.

Well I want to give my personal opinion on the subject.



Why must black women be so critical of each other? Aka "Hating" Really... what is the problem? We have all been there or maybe some you haven't.... let's just say you're walking through the mall, you're dressed nice, well put together, minding your own business and then you walk by a group of sista's and you get the glare,rolling of eyes, the sucking on the teeth, the whispers, the cackling ,they scan you from head to toe like your at an airport. Or maybe you just have observed this situation. Or maybe you're even guilty of doing the "hating." It's quite sad....because they don't know you  from Adam and have never done anything to you but just simply EXIST. 

 But In retro speck they are REALLY saying...she looks nice....I wish I was that confident and well put together.I do like her hair or her lipstick shade...... but nooooooo it's way too hard to compliment her.....that takes away from you right? (Sarcasm)
Not even knowing what her fellow fabulous looking sista may be going through....you still feel the need to "hate." Honestly I get more compliments overall by other races....specifically my Caucasian counterparts. Do any of you sistas out there feel the same way?

 I feel most of the problem stems from jealously and insecurity of what is lacking in one's life.  (Not even knowing what her fellow sista has or had to deal with or sacrifice to get  to where she's at)You cannot tell from her outward appearance...nor by her Facebook pictures on what's really going on in her life. Don't be jealous of her relationship (s) because companionship doesn't mean she's happy and singleness doesn't mean shes lonely.
Besides looks there are some of the other issues I think black women have with each other.
Jealous of how people to you respond and or gravitate towards you....charm...personality...the accolades you may receive.

Oh and the forever stale topic of skin tone and hair...when will we ever get over that? Get out of that slavery mindset! No need to be jealous or think you're better than another because everyone is beautiful. Dark skin, light skin,caramel, fair, coarse hair, long hair, curly,short hair....it's all beautiful.
Another scenario ignoring or failing to acknowledge the success in another sista's life...whether it's her career, her marriage, or any other type of accomplishment.
That should give you encouragement and inspiration....get you to thinking hmmmm maybe I can do that too. Seriously work hard and pray on it!

Contrary to popular belief the black community would be a lot further in life if we stopped downing one another. One major issue I sense with other black women that if a that sista gets that job, that man, etc that there won't be enough left for the rest of the sista's. 

It is that unspoken competition that destroys us. It's sad when I walk through a store or anywhere for that matter and see a fellow black woman... attempt to make eye contact with her but yet receive the cold stare or the irritated look. WHY? Sista girl we are all going through a struggle. It's challenging out there in the world for us (in the workplace, the media, society etc) so why must we challenge each other too?!


Let's stop withholding our connections ,tips,pointers and recommendations simply because you feel  that she's your competition. Let's start helping one another out.Whether it's a job, career, an outfit, a hairstyle, her car....if someone asks who does your hair, let her know. Or if someone asks you about your outfit, at least let her know the mall you usually shop at. As the saying goes "Stop blocking!" We are all trying to get ahead in life but we must put an end to the stepping on or blocking one another to do so.




The SOLUTION?

Sista's begin to lift one another up,  encourage each other, that successful woman, that beautiful black woman with the real long hair that you are so jealous of just may be going through something. She may not be going through the same thing as you....but sometimes you don't even know what you're really jealous of.  Her Outward appearance may not resemble her heart.....which may be hurting.

I want us to bring back the unity and wholeness black women had back in the day. When you see another sista SMILE at her....no stone face or glare. You never know what a simple smile can do for another person.

Compliment her hairstyle, don't look for the negative, ask where she got her shoes, admire her charming personality, tell her you like her Facebook picture. We all have something that one another does not possess. That's what makes us all so special. So there's really no need to be jealous. Sista's we need to get it together. What God has for you is for you....what God has for her is for her. No one will or can ever take that away from you.

Let's stop treating and judging one another so harshly!   Positivity and love on DECK! 

Mark 12:31 And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.


Whew and that's how this odd black girl feels. Your thoughts?